In which Charlie gets Overcome By Technology

Blooming heck!

Firefox.

Performancing.

Google.

Not enough whiskey in this world.

They told me this would be easy.

They lied.

Twice.

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Moving Television

Are you ever left wondering, "What's that tune?" when the advertisments are on the moving television. Well, here's a database of soundtracks that could assist.

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More Art

Fantastic.

Works by Andy Goldsworthy.

In which Charlie Keeps His Word.

Charlie was lucky enough recently to be given an invitation for a Googlemail account.

Now part of the deal was that I would mention the splendid chap that offered this to me, so pop yourselves over to Liew Cheon Fong's webpage, where you may enjoy the many and varied delights on offer by Malaysia's first successful full-time blogger. And jolly interesting it is too.

Thanks again, LcF - and more power to you.

In which Charlie (who should Know Better) goes to IngerLand.

It Comes to Pass, from time to time, that I have do Things myself. Real Things, you know, not just reading the paper or going for haircut, but Proper Things, and today is just such a day. The Flame-Haired Temptress has gone away (but says she'll be back soon...) and Truss (my retainer) has had to go and spend some time with his family, which he does with increasing regularity, so I'm left to my own resources. So I've been sitting here, reading about Tobacco - God's gift to Man and other Flat Earth society tomfoolery, which diverted me for a tad. Then I was wondering how 'Pastor' Haggard was up to, and sure enough it's monkey business. What did I tell you? Then, I found this - blooming heck! I was reading about a Theory of Civilization too, but you decide if it cuts the mustard. Finally over to Kirby's museum - why not download the PDF and read at your leisure.
Anyway, I felt that I should be doing something constructive with my day, so I decide to Go Out. On my own. I took a car from the garage (eventually deciding on the white one that Truss calls 'God' - as it moves in a Mysterious Way), and drove off. There are few things in this life more dangerous that driving into IngerLand (taunting tigers, maybe, or ignoring the Flame-Haired Temptress), but that's what I did, my dears. As a general rule of thumb, I pay people to do Things for me - which is the whole point of being rich - but as I said, I had Things To Do, which meant going into IngerLand.
For those of you who live in Foreign Climes, IngerLand looks, at first glance, quite like England, but somewhere along the line, the Loonies took over the place and Mayhem Ensued. The first difference you notice is the Driving. Now, I'm a Gentleman Motorist, as you would expect. I let others join the flow, I give way readily, I wave pedestrians across the road, I respect the rights of my fellow drivers.
The IngerLish, however, do Things Differently. For one thing they drive something called 'a 4x4' - which I would assume should be 'a 16', but there you go. These '4x4s' are simply hideous. They are great, bulky, wardrobe-shaped jobbies, with bull-bars on the front and back (though they never, ever, go anywhere near livestock), they are covered in chrome and spare wheels, and have a special device fitted as standard that interferes with the mentality of the driver. This causes them to act like Bounders and Cads. It makes them screw up their face in a rictus of venomous spite and drive straight at you. I've seen them descend from these '4x4s' and it's not a pretty sight, let me tell you. The males are invariably overweight, with bullet heads and more tattoos than a Tahitian war chief. They dress like sportsmen, when exercise is obviously an unknown concept to them, with liberal drapings of 'gold' jewellery (making them look like a barmaid from a particularly low stew) and they all carry portable telephones, into which they bark like demented walruses. They are called 'Jase' or 'Gaz'. The females, in contrast, are bitter-faced, scrawny, raddled harridans, squeezed into acrylic clothing that is four sizes too small even for their skeletal carcases, who screech like harpies at all and sundry. They are called 'Trace' or 'Shaz'. Don't get me started on the odious offspring of their base couplings.
But I'm getting side-tracked. I parked the jalopy and made my way to a nearby emporium, for I had Things to Buy. In I went, and blow me if I didn't have to help myself. Not an assistant in sight. I was, following the example set by the other patrons, obliged to take a wire perambulator and put my purchases therein! And what purchases - everything was in tins and packets. I thought I might treat myself to something moreish for supper, but fat chance. Not a pheasant or lobster to be had, even for Ready Money. I settled instead for a tin of Bully Beef and something called a 'ready meal for one'. It had a picture of something brown on it, with what looked like game chips and an apple propped against it. I asked a chappie in a polyester suit, who had a plastic badge with 'Manager' on it pinned to him, where I might find the Armagnac but he said Something Rude so I left it at that, and made my way to the 'checkout', where I paid the blank-eyed shopgirl for my stuff and hot-footed it out of there.
I took a belt from the old hip flask, fired up the motor, and proceeded to the Bank, where I had my Things to Do. The last time I was in the Bank a fellow from the Officer Class took me into his office, gave me a small, passable sherry, and fiddled with a pile of papers. I signed a couple of the papers, shook his hand and off I popped. Not so this time. I was made to join a queue and wait until a 'cashier' was ready to attend to my Banking Needs. She was a personable enough sort of a chit, in her way, but I suspect she wasn't altogether au fait with the Mother Tongue, as she interspersed the conversation with sprinklings of 'youknowslike' and 'innits'. Top and bottom of it all was that everything was tinkerty-tonk after all, and I had too much cash in some account or other, so I should consider 'Spreading my Investments' or some such. Well I don't know. I said that she do what she thought best. I don't expect the Bank ever bothered Father with this Sort of Thing.
I thought about slipping round to the Club but I was feeling jaded and drained, so home was my next port of call. I gave the 'ready meal for one' to the hounds, but they turned their noses up at it. The Bully Beef went into an stew, which my batman had shown me how to make many years ago. There should be a decent claret left in the cellar somewhere, if I can figure out Truss's system.
I'll tell you more about IngerLand at a later date.

And...

...another one bites the dust.

If you must put people on pedestals, wear a big hat.

Ah, schadenfreude.
Charlie's heart is gladdened by the downfall of Ted Haggard.
If, as I have suggested previously, you have watched that nice Mr Dawkins's Root of all Evil, then you will have seen Haggard in action. In spite of obviously being dumber than a bag of hammers, this lumphead was somehow smart enough to realise that Mr Dawkins was running rings around him and, in a fine display of self-righteous indignation, promptly threw him out of his 'church'.
Immediately, the name 'Haggard' was added to Charlie's special list of ones to watch.
And sure enough, he didn't disappoint us.
The leader of thirty million evangelicals is, it turns out, a drug-addled Bertie. Now hang on a second, you may protest, you're saying that like it's a bad thing Charlie, and of course you're right. What right have I to point this thing at anyone, wallowing as I do in my own pit of depravity? "Charlie, Charlie," you say,"What do you expect from a finger-pointing, curtain-twitching, god-bothering mountebank like that? Of course he's a wrong 'un. Look at the spud-headed, preening, smarmy little prig. Listen to the slavering, smug, holier-than-thou drivel he spouts. For crying out loud Charlie, don't tell us you expected him to be anything other than a lying, cheating, two-faced toerag?"
OK, but I haven't made my money by telling the hard-of-thinking how to live their miserable little lives - unlike the slimy, hypocritical Haggard. And you know damn well that in the fullness of time he'll be back, choking back the crocodile tears and whining that Satan made him do it, or the Lord was testing him, or some other feeble excuse, and his blinkered, grateful flock will welcome him right back into their open arms whilst clucking about forgiveness and repentance, and patting themselves on the back for their Christ-like clemency. The pompous viper will be right back where he started, and not one of his knuckle-dragging disciples will stop to think that everything -everything- he told them was a tissue of bare-faced lies (yes, including the god stuff). That's what rattles me. And that's why, for now, I'm going to enjoy every squirm and every tear, and relish each new twist of the knife in his hard, black, duplicitous heart.

As St. Jake put it, "Beware of the Bull..."

A pretty kettle of fish

I've had a quiet day in today, just me and my difference engine, and a nice claret breathing sweetly for later, with some cold cuts, I'm told, in the pantry too. Amongst the things that have caught my fancy have been these, which I hope you may find worthy of your perusal.

First of all, in spite of what we may think of our colonial cousins, they sometimes throw up the odd gem. Over at TayTV, I've been enjoying the comments of a Mr Keith Olbermann, who seems to be sparky young fellow, with plenty to say for himself. Throw away your television itself is spiffing too - they have a Top Ten documentaries section, which includes that nice Mr Dawkins's recent televisual treat. And speaking of that nice Mr Dawkins, this is rather good too. TayTV also have Penn and Teller. Nice.

Meanwhile, the moving television beckons tonight, so don't throw it away just yet. QI, of course, continues (with a super performance from Ronni Ancona, doing an impression of my Great-Aunt Georgina. I wonder if she knows her? Uncanny, if she doesn't), but Mr Schama is out tonight too, telling us all about the life and times of Michelangelo Merisi.

You may already know this, but the Complete Works of Charles Darwin are now available for all to view. For free.

On the evolutionary theme, have you heard about this whey-faced loon's barmy idea? Luckily, proper boffins and top scientists are close at hand. Phew.

Speaking of whey-faced loons, here are a few more insults to add to your armoury. Use them well, use them often, but do use them.

Fun with microscopes.

The War against Trevor (unfortunate acronym alert) and The Taxis of Elvis is getting out of hand. These figures, courtesy of Mr Bywater (yes, that Mr Bywater), certainly made me think.

Finally, Leonardo at the V & A. Make sure you see the animations.

Friday the Thirteenth

Have you ever wonder what the world's most expensive whatever was? Learn the price, but not the value, of all sorts of whatevers here.

"It has been a common saying of physicians in England, that a cucumber should be well sliced, and dressed with pepper and vinegar, and then thrown out, as good for nothing."
Today's recommended literary treat is Hester Lynch Thrale Piozzi's Anecdotes of the late Samuel Johnson. Then pop yourself across to the Samuel Johnson sound bites page for more Johnsonian japery.

I also like Shakespeare searched.

This is fun. How to carve grotesque pumpkins. Hallowe'en is just around the corner.

But will we get there? Not according to Nikolai Fedorovsky.

Jake's thing

Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone - Jake on the Box and Jake Thackray His Songs on BBC4 at 21.00 today. Let best beef be eaten.

Spem in Alium

I was reminded of Janet Cardiff's Forty Part Motet the other day, which I saw (heard?) at the Liverpool Tate several years ago. After rooting about in the Music Room for a while, I found my copy of Tallis's Spem in Alium, and I am still listening to it today, it's so fine.

So why not wait until the sun's over the yardarm (bearing in mind that it's over it somewhere in the world), have someone pour you a tumbler of Armagnac, put your feet up and relax.

Maybe ponder on this, though.

Rattlebag

The new series of QI begins tonight on the moving television. Tally-ho.

Invaluable info on Plum's oeuvre.

People who work for a living (!) and what they did.

That most aristocratic of games at cards - Piquet. Happy memories.

What a treat. Pliny the Elder's Natural History. Pop round to the index too - Crumbs.

A stinky bird. Make up your own jokes....

And speaking of jokes, fancy a chuckle? How about Darwinism Refuted. Well, it made me laugh all right. Which reminds me - spiffing to see that nice Mr. Dawkins chatting to Mr. Paxman the other night.

Florilegium

I'm coming to the conclusion that the flame-haired temptress must have been a tennis player at some time or other - love means nothing to her.

That said, only the other night we were expecting rain together, when she gave me a wry smile and pointed to this on her difference engine. Two glasses of the green fairy followed in swift order.

The Sherlockian stamps earlier made me think about Beekeeping

How can you not love a web-site called Head-smashed-in Buffalo Jump ?

Here's a novelty - A Weather Map - in Latin

Plenty to see at EXPO

Cut the Medieval mustard here.

A lovely planetarium which impressed the be-jaysus out of me.

A page of Pre-Raphaelite links, where red-headed women abound.

The most captivating place on Earth - Mont Saint Michel. Build your own.

And so to bed ... with Ruffian Dick's Arabian Nights.

Today's collectanea

Hmmm....

Sherlock Holmes stamps

Followed by

Mindpicnic

Then, the excellent OUP blog's Oddest English Spellings : Parts One, Two, Three and Four.

And a couple of illusions here and here (but have a peep at the rest of the riches on offer too).

Methinks we need to be more careful ...

Stupid people

Charlie's a wee bit miffed today, so for the first time in ages I am pointing this thing at you (and you know who you are...).

Any blog that has "Annoying Stupid People one woo at a time" as a tag-line is bound to get Charlie's approval, (although I don't approve of the language used by these young shavers, which would be better left in the tap-room, where it belongs). Wickedly funny however, bless 'em.

Beware of the God. Lots of bullets here to fire at annoyed stupid people.

Or turn their own guns against them.

And if we're bashing the bishops, let's not forget the delicious Landover Baptists. (May not be altogether safe for your wife or servants).

It would be oxymoronic to claim him as a saint, but on the moving television last night, Mr Steel's smashing lecture on Tom Paine. More here too.

'How much is that doggy in the window?'
'Sorry Sir, it's not for sale'. Crikey.

But seriously, more stupid people and the lunacy they espouse. Unconvinced?

Are you getting the idea yet? Then start here.

Eke

I've been reading Geoffrey Chaucer Hath a Blog for a while now (and jolly good it is too) but this post is especially fine - It's Serpentes on a Shippe!

Defense of Poesy

What the Dickens was going through the addled mind of top-rhymster William Wordsworth when he settled himself down in a comfy armchair, took up his trusty pen and decided that what the world needed most was a poem entitled "To the Spade of a Friend"? I can fully understand William Topaz McGonagall wanting to extol the virtues of Beecham's Pills. I can forgive the well-intentioned sentiments that resulted in A Tragedy by Theophilus Marzials. Julia A Moore (The Sweet Singer of Michigan) probably, at one time or another, had second thoughts, one of them being, "Hmmm, not quite up to snuff this time, Julia." Samuel Pepys thought the poetry of Margaret Cavendish, Duchess of Newcastle, was "the most ridiculous thing that ever was wrote", and she doubtless had niggling doubts about some of her latest lines once in a while. But a poem to a shovel? And what was on Mr Burns' mind here?

Salmagundi

Here be more chimeras.

The scientific term for the common tomato is lycopersicon lycopersicum, which means "wolf peach."

I have great sympathy for another chap with a penchant for flame-haired temptresses...

There is no cure for curiosity (see number 4). I would add, "Wear your learning like your watch, in a private pocket; do not pull it out and strike it merely to show you have one." For more of Lord Chesterfield's sayings, go here.

Returning to the Scopes 'Monkey Trial' (See July 25th's posting), here's Clarence Darrow on Voltaire. Splendid.

Omnium gatherum

Just a few morsels today to whet your appetites.

The Garret - take the tour.

The Solar System true to scale - try something similar yourself in Celestia.

Lenticular clouds, anyone?

Make your own kumiss - "...take extreme care lest the bottle explode...".

The life of Charlie Patton by Robert Crumb!

Gaullimaufry

I was having a wee read about Timocharis and one thing led to another, so here are a few bits for your edification.

The Astronomy Corner has a grand games page with some cracking essays.

The Ancient Library has scans of works regarding, oddly enough, ancient history (including Hazlitt's 1851 Classical Gazeteer)

Inconstant Moon is simply wonderful - if lunar astronomy sharpens your pencil.

The Galileo Project also does what it says it will and is good at it too.

The ornithology of Anglo-Saxon England. Jolly D.

A site about sausages which has a recipe for red onion marmalade.

I didn't know that Gauloises weren't made in France anymore. If you do smoke them, try rolling your own in liquorice papers. Delish.

Take plenty of time to examine the riches on offer at the Victorian Times Project. And in a similar vein, Deb's Historical Research Page is equally fine.





And here's a picture of a flower.







Tuscany Superb, as you ask.

Best of Times

Mr Zimmerman has a new recording for sale.
It's really rather good.
If you'd like to sing along, you may read the lyrics here.

Live man walking

The Walking Englishman is so very pleasant on the eye and is most informative too. Lovely.

All Kinds of Everything

Well, where shall we go today?

More orchids for starters, perhaps? And bonsai too?

Or how about some more microscopy?

We could have a peep at some pictures of some wonderful chimeras.

Then, a comprehensive page of herbalism links.

Maybe some free utilities downloads?

And to finish, Portmeirion and the Botanical Garden.

Right, I'm off to read a book. (Barchester Towers, as you ask. Charlie likes to curl up with a little trollop of an evening....).

Running on empty

Here's the story of the 1904 Olympic Marathon.

Fantastic.

Woke up this morning....

Now Charlie's not one for tooting another's clarinet but credit where it's due.

Mr Fitzgerald writes a splendid blog over at Squeeze my Lemon, which has wonders aplenty. As the name suggests (to those of us who listen to such things) it's all about the Blues and related matters and bless my soul, he roots stuff out which even I haven't heard, so the customary apes, ivory and peacocks go to him.

Amongst his recent posts he has links to the magnificent Delta Blues Museum, which in turn has a link to the related Purple Beech's Uncensored History of the Blues, which has detailed information all about Mr Rugel's podcasts of the same name. These may be downloaded from Odeo's podcast thingummy and played at your convenience on a portable listening device. Ah, these modern times in which we live.

Thank you, Messers Fitzgerald and Rugel both.

Still here...

I hate to say 'I told you so' but we're all still here!



Told you so.

No longer with us

So, if the world is going to end, what else has gone before?

And, just to pass the time, how about Nudist Trampolining (yes, really)?

...and I feel fine.

It's the end of the world as we know it...

...anyone fancy a tenner on us all still being here on Wednesday?
I feel we might be.

In a grain of sand

Continuing to recover...
I felt up to misting the orchids this morning, then found this diverting thing about electron-microscopy.
Be amazed, my dears.

Ah, the ennui.
Watching Betjemen on the moving television but taking no pleasure from it. Tried listening to Vashti Bunyan and Anne Briggs earlier but that failed too. And the flame-haired temptress is feeding me some filthy Chilean slop that says Merlot on the label but I fear is a llama-based beverage. They say, by the way, that anchovies are endangered. What shall we do for relish and sauce? We need something to make plain toast palatable and toasted cheese and ham edible.

A civilized man cast among fundamentalists

H.L. Mencken on the Scopes 'Monkey' trial.
Delightful.

Things to do during the heatwave...

The Toymaker has some nice paper toys to make.

Whereas, if lists are your thing, here's a list of lists (best of 2005 stuff).

Growabrain has an excellent page of Bob Dylan links.

Nurse would take us to the Natural History Museum during the summer hols, so this brings it all flooding back.

Retrolounge

Now here's a delight - Retrolounge.

In the air tonight.

When Charlie was a boy, Nanny would sit me on her knee of an evening and tinker with a cat's whisker.
Happy days.
Here's what we heard - thanks to RadioLovers.

Automata

What a diverting little bagatelle.
Chomick + Meder Figurative art and automata.
Take the time to peek at their links page too.
Super duper.

Spaced

Fascinating photos of the cosmos. July 10th 2006 is amazing.

RIP

In memory of Frederic (Fred) Arthur Clark. ("He was often wrong but never in doubt").

Oh Dear Me

It's doing the rounds so I thought I'd mention it.
A colonial pro-lifer who takes an article in The Onion to task (from 1999 mind you), overlooking the fact that the said publication is an on-line satirical magazine.
Read the comments too.

Hmmm

It seems that the 100 best websites for men can be found here.
And the best for women here.
Worth a look but if these are the best, what must the worst be like?

Jack yourself

Now, I'm not one for doing-it-myself but some things have a pleasure attached.
Try this DIY Jack the Dripper page.

Aural ambrosia

For your further delectation I offer the following links to sites, blogs and what have you, that all have mp3s drawn from old 78s.
Pure pleasure.

Juneberry78
shellacshanty
foldedspace

French

La Vie Francaise sells French stuff.
Good luck to them.

More traditional palates will probably stick to Fortnum's.
Each to his own, I say.

Furniture abuse

The state of British education is now so bad that the great unwashed aren't even taught how to utilise common items of furniture these days. Here we see a young shaver from a 'sink estate' baffled by a rush-bottomed chair. Yet this buffoon has recently been appointed to high office in a well-known chain of 'fast-food emporia' on a salary of several hundred pounds per annum. What message does this send out to his peers?
I have all this on good authority from Crown Prince Louis-Phillippe, who was a fellow guest of the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence at their splendid rest home in Derbyshire. When he is returned to his rightful position he assures me that this sort of thing will be brought to a swift end. I look forward to a return of standards.
Saw a chap in town today in brown shoes. We have a long road ahead of us, I fear.

Mr Key speaks

As I lay in the recovery position, some comfort was had from listening to Mr Key's wireless messages. The flame-haired temptress transferred them to something called an 'mp3 player' and I'd urge you to do the same.
You should, if you're paying attention, be familiar with Mr Key by now. If you missed this vital information, then pop along to his Hooting Yard interweb electropage forthwith.

Here we are again...

Well, that was unexpected!
As you'll see if you peep at the date of the last post, there's been a wee hiatus.
Charlie's been a tad poorly so the flame-haired temptress took me away to get better.
The flame-haired temptress has idiosyncratic views about what might aid the ailing chap and her methods are severe and intense.
Suffice to say, I can now walk again, unaided, although the hands shake a little and the vision is blurred, but that's what flame-haired temptresses are for.

So back to business.

More Da Vinci nonsense

It just goes on and on........

Dance, monkeys, dance

This just about sums it all up.

Glad to be living in the twenty-first century

Red heifers!
Whatever next?

They don't make 'em like that anymore.

"I want an elegant Christian lady of wealth, under thirty, belonging to a first class family..."

The fabulous story of Charles Julius Guiteau is here, with more here and here.
What a guy!

Oldie but goodie

...and what are they smoking ? Why ...

of course.

The world in a grain...

A diverting look at Droste effects, which reminded me of this.
Optical illusions can be fun - but some are downright dangerous. The one you will find here is, as the description says, the scariest illusion you will ever see. Do not look at it if you have a heart condition, are prone to nightmares or scared of your own shadow. Honestly. I mean it.

Lost and Found

I've mentioned Mr Bywater's excellent Lost Worlds before, in which he, quite rightly, notes that in England it is a Lost Property Office whilst in France it is the Bureau des Objets Trouves.

Look at what I found recently.

Ah, the days of Empire.

Not much worth watching

The moving television has very little worth watching at the best of times, but today's programmes look particularly tiresome.
Shame I missed the documentary about the Taxis of Elvis and the War on Trevor, though!

Bad Charlie

Of course Charlie reads The Daily Lush. Could you expect otherwise? Read here how my namesake met his end. Spiffing.

Boilerplate

Boilerplate - Marvel of the Age ?

Grey Amber

... until a comparatively late day, the precise origin of ambergris remained, like amber itself, a problem to the learned. Though the word ambergris is but the French compound for grey amber, yet the two substances are quite distinct. For amber, though at times found on the sea-coast, is also dug up in some far inland soils, whereas ambergris is never found except upon the sea. Besides, amber is a hard, transparent, brittle, odorless substance, used for mouth-pieces to pipes, for beads and ornaments; but ambergris is soft, waxy, and so highly fragrant and spicy, that it is largely used in perfumery, in pastiles, precious candles, hair-powders, and pomatum.

Melville Moby Dick

The New intended Act of Parliament

For the Benefit of Young Men, Old Men, Wives, Old Maids, Batchelors, Widows, &c.
AT a Meeting of several Ladies and Gentlemen of this Town, held for the better management and conducting of order and regularity of Society, Mr Steady in the chair, the following Resolutions were passed :—

3d. That no Warehouse Clerk, Counter-hopper, Chimney-sweeper, Journey-man, Apprentice, or Dandy, shall smoke a cigar in the street before six o'clock in the morning, or after ten in the evening; for every such offence to grind logwood with their teeth for three months.

5th. That no Old Maid, Wife, or Married woman, shall take more than one pound of snuff in a week, and not take more than one pinch during hours of cooking, for fear of dropping it from their nose into the gravy, under the penalty of not having another pinch for one month.

7th. That any Washer-woman, or any woman going out to daily work, shall be allowed to keep one half of her earnings, and the other half shall be given to her lord and master for drinking money.

10th. That every bachelor, at the age of forty, be compelled to keep two wives, to make up for lost time ; in neglecting so to do, he shall pay a fine of five pounds....to go to the poorest couple in the parish in which he lives.

More.

Mistaken Identity

Sometimes what you think is true, isn't.
The Elephant Man?

To each his own...

Neuroscientists on stamps!

Maketh the man

In an increasingly barbarous age, let's remember Emily Post. Tips for us all here, I fear.

Vital information

If UFOs land, do you know what to do?
If you don't, then you need to read this as soon as possible.

The next big thing

"They produce a fictional history of this kind, which they style the Gospel of Judas." Irenaeus, Adversus Haereses.
If you though it was safe to come out after the Da Vinci nonsense, wait until this one hits the fan.

Jacks high

Pick your own Jack - Ripper or Dripper ?

Lileks

You could get up to all kinds of mischief here.
It's James Lilek's site.

Agapemonites

You couldn't make this sort of stuff up and get away with it.
Read the story of the Agapemonites , Reverend H J Prince and Reverend John Hugh Smyth-Pigott - and don't miss the bit about the 'undercover masseur'.
Fantastic.

Incidentally, a (different?) John Hugh Smyth-Pigott offered a copy of Blake's The Marriage of Heaven and Hell for sale in 1849. Nobody bought it. He tried again in 1853 and it went for £4.16s. It's now in the Fitzwilliam in Cambridge.

Late. Great.

The Jake Thackray website.
Enough said.

Several thousand words

I know. You know. I know you know. You know I know. But there are some little chickens who may not know, so they can find out at the Web Gallery of Art.

Cronic fatigue syndrome

The Cronicles (sic) of Narnia ?
Dear oh dear.............

Leonora

A links page for Leonora Carrington. And another.
And forgeries.

You never know...

You never know when you may be faced with this situation, and what would you do if you did not know what you should do?

An old favourite

I've enjoyed Forkbeard Fantasy for quite a while now.

Icelandic cuisine

You cannot have too much information on Þorláksmessa - The Day of St. Thorlakur or skyr.

Babbage's Act

A man after my own heart - Charles Babbage on Street Nuisances.

Fake Amber and how to avoid it.

Strangely enough Ms Pavord makes no mention of this subject in her excellent book The Tulip, so to rectify this omission, you may wish to amend your copy with this, How to buy amber. How to detect fake amber. An article by Mistress Gunnora Hallakarva.

Things to do on a rainy Saturday (pt. 23)

Pondering on the White Doe of Rylstone and the fate of the Nortons (which I don't do frequently enough) I came upon this piece about the Pilgrimage of Grace. This led me to the links page of the same site, which is very red.

Could be handy?

Not that Charlie would stoop so low, but if you wanted to mock something up, knowing the font could be useful.

Thought I'd mention...

This is The Fantastic in Art and Fiction site.

Friends of Dorothy?

I do wish this site about Mrs Parker was prettier to look at (to be honest Tonstant Weader, I nearly fwowed up). But it's worth the pain for the audio clips alone.

I doubt that

Rain batters my panes and tonight Charlie needs more than a glass of Kendal Black Drop at his elbow for distraction. The follies of the masses raise me a tad.

A little learning

At the Luminarium you will find pleasures aplenty on which the mind may feast.
And if reading butters your parsnips, then Project Gutenberg is for you, as is the Bookworm.
Eke words at the Phrontistery too.

Food glorious food

The pleasures gustatory may be sated by a Gode Cookbook.

Sum somes

We've mentioned phi before, I know, but let's flog the horse a little more.
Here are things about Fibonacci numbers, an online (or downloadable) phiculator and a geometrical method of deriving phi.

All clever stuff

Cripes - more top boffins and chaps with big brains have been at it. Get your Earl Grey and a comfy chair, settle down and prepare to be amazed.

The Life of Brian...

I have not watched, nor ever intend watching, something called Lost on the moving television.
However, it seems that our colonial cousins have gotten (as they say) themselves into a flap about The Third Policeman and links in the said program (as they spell).
Good Lord's amercy, whatever next? They'll be reading Jurgen next.

Mark Ryden

Click the link to see the work of Mark Ryden.

Spectacular.

I simply cannot recommend Mr Key's Hooting Yard too highly.
It is a delight, the man is a saint and should have apes, ivory and peacocks delivered daily to his door.
Go there now but expect to spend several days, at least, exploring. You will be richly rewarded.

Woof

Ah, the pleasure of communion with like-minded souls (part umpteen).
A sanctuary for the cynical.
Tickety-boo.

K Louise Judd

The art of the said lady can be seen here. Well, I like it.

Proceedings Of The Athanasius Kircher Society

Does what it says on the tin. Proceedings Of The Athanasius Kircher Society

Morpheus?

Listening to Mr Fagen's latest platter (on DVD-A) and reading this. It's not just me who needs to get out more.

Pirates

We Pastafarians know that it's the lack of pirates that is causing global warming. We need more pirates if we are to solve this problem, so you'll find this a useful resource.

The Waste Land

Here are links to sites about The Waste Land - (and here too).
And, if tarot imagery floats your boat, have a look at Gorey's cards.

It's all good

I like the paintings of Chet Zar - what do you think?

Please have a look around his site - don't let the flashy interface put you off.

Bosch

Now this is interesting. All about JHeronimus (sic) Bosch. Don't miss the 'make your own Bosch painting' in the Links and Games area (it helps if you read Dutch).

Die Kunst, Recht zu behalten

Never really took to Arthur - and perhaps this may be the reason why.
You may find this useful, however. It's the Art Of Controversy.

Old books?

Ah, happy days.
Talking of which, who likes old books?
Well, so does this chap and here's the proof.
(And my socks are black, of course).

Jag känner mig sömnig, en kort ögonblicks vila skulle göra mig gott.

... and there, beside the daric, was an old photo of an old friend of mine. I'd forgotten all about it, so here it is for you to enjoy. (And yes,as you ask, I did. We met in Mexico - he had a thing for the flame-haired temptress so I threated him with Norma, which soon put paid to matters.)

These days

I have been in a brown study of late, and musing too on the last words of Norman Douglas and their relevance to my own life. Only the other day I was searching behind the diorama of Mont St Michel for a daric I had dropped and which had rolled there, when I remembered Billy Sidis. It all made sense, suddenly. You do see, don't you?

Of course it's true

It's not just me. There are millions of us - so we must be right.
Check out the evidence for yourself. It's undeniable.
Read more here.
.
And David Attenborough is with us too.

Converted!

Spread the word.
I've got religion.

HE is the way!

I'm born-again as a Pastafarian.

Face off...

Now here's a useful sort of a thing, if you find this sort of thing useful. See the face behind the face, as Mr Gabriel sang.

HaWorth a visit

I like this shop.
Reminds me of the good old days.
If you can't get there, they'll post it to you.

Sumthing adds up...

It seems top boffins and chaps with big brains have been doing some hard sums and have come up with this sort of stuff. Makes you think.

Nihilartikel and Mountweazel 2

I've mentioned this sort of thing before.
Here's a bit more of the same.
It's Ern Malley.

In the round.

Now these electric daguerreotypes are a bit swish. Travel the world. And from your own sitting room, too.
Des Esseintes, you should be with us now.

It's only words.

And dash it all, Miss Coren is on later, banging on about etymology. I feel I'm getting value for the licence fee tonight.

Darwin's Rottweiler

That nice Mr Dawkins is on the moving television this evening. See him talking to grown men who have imaginary friends, to whom they talk, and who can grant them wishes. Crikey!
Watch out kids.

Notebook?

Listen to me. Some things are worth having. You can settle for rubbish or you can have the best. The Moleskine notebook, for example. Just get some. They sell them at Blackwell's and you can afford them.

Charlie's back!

Good evening, mes enfants. Uncle Charlie is back, with a shiny new computer, and he's not afraid to use it. So sit back and enjoy the ride.

The Online Medieval and Classical Library

A collection of some of the most important literary works of Classical and Medieval civilization.
You should be reading this, you know. Do yourself a favour.